Renna Nightingale’s Archive

What a Semester!

Sunday, December 18th, 2011

This semester has been crazy! I can’t believe it’s over. It seems like just yesterday I returned to school early for Alpha Leader training and was standing on the steps of West Campus waiting for my freshmen! It has been a season of laughter, hope, growth, tears, and fun!

Some of my top highlights:

-My alpha group! We shared amazing adventures such as paint wars, pumpkin carving, Christmas parties, Secret Santa, movie nights, baked goods, deep conversations, prayer, one-on-ones, Donut Man, field trips, photo shoots, worship, and so much more! I will always cherish the wonderful people and awesome memories!

-Living Situation! I lived in Bowles, which is a bit of a ways from campus. But as our T-shirts say, “It’s worth the walk!” I was blessed with incomparable roommates with whom I could not have lived without.

-Theatre! I am a Theater Arts major, and I absolutely loved my classes this semester! I took Musical Theater Workshop, Intermediate Acting, and Tap. It was such a blessing to learn and be challenged in what I love! I have grown so much in my craft this semester.

-AC Group! As an alpha leader, I was placed into a group of eleven other people that I spent training, Bridges (super secret alpha training trip!), once a week. They became another family for me at APU.

Words cannot describe how grateful I am for this semester! I don’t know how it can get better than this :)

 

 

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God’s Love in Langa

Tuesday, April 26th, 2011

Today included a visit to a township called Langa. It was named for the chief, Langa Libalele. Although it is mostly a Xhosa township, “Langa Libalele” means the same in Xhosa as it does in Zulu. Translated, it the township’s name means “the sun, it is hot.” I was so excited to know the true name of the township! All my hardcore Zulu studying this semester definitely paid off.

I was super surprised at the level of development in Langa. It seems to have evolved into a tourist attraction. Our tour guide commented that the residents like it when tourists come. I assume that is because tourists generate revenue and excitement in the township.

I was also shocked at the contrast between the homes. In one section of Langa, there were exceedingly nice homes. They looked like they could have belonged in a rich suburban area in Los Angeles. But then, across the street, there would be crumbling shack composed of assorted trash. The polarity between the disparity verses the wealth was alarming!!!

My favorite aspects of Langa were it’s art programs! They have a dance studio, a stage for theatre, music programs, a picture framing school, a fashion store, a recording studio and a radio station! The township’s goal in these programs is to educate youth and grant skills to adults so that they may have a better life, as well as attempt to provide AIDS prevention. At the radio station, they talk about difficult issues such as the effects of HIV and AIDS. These programs allow the kids to express themselves in creative ways, as well as allow them to dream for their futures.

I am so passionate about arts programs! I believe they have the most significant impact upon youth. If I was given the choice of something to do to benefit a township, I would have dreamed of beginning a program exactly like this. I hope that it can continue and flourish!

I got to play the djembe today! It’s an awesome African drum. I have found my calling.

My absolute favorite part about walking around Langa today: I was sauntering with my friend Kelly. And all of a sudden, this beautiful little girl runs up to us, and slips her tiny hands in ours, and continues with us on our journey! It was the most precious thing of my entire life! And in that moment, I felt perfect love. I loved her. I had only known her for 30 seconds, but already, she had stolen my heart, because she loved me. To think. I traveled all the way around the world to search for more about God’s love, and I found it in a four year old child.

Amen.

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Homesick For a Place I’ve Never Been

Tuesday, April 26th, 2011

Wisdom from my dear friend, Francesca: “Listen up to what God has to say. He tends to be the loudest when we’re the loneliest.”

The South Africa semester has recently journeyed from Pietermaritzburg to the beautiful Cape Town. We have about two weeks left in Africa.

I’ve been feeling lonely recently. And when I feel lonely in a foreign country, such as South Africa, I often feel the need to talk to my best friend, who happens to be my mother. It’s been weeks since I last spoke with her.

The internet here is not exactly reliable… therefore, I haven’t even been able to email my mom and let her know how she can pray for me, which is somewhat discouraging, and rather frustrating.

And I was crying out to God.

“DADDY! WHY will you not let me talk to my mom?! It’s been forever! And I need her!!!”

(Don’t read this next part, Mom.)

And God said, “Ren. I am all you need. You are whole in me.”

I processed this.

“Yeah. God, you are so RIGHT!” Because, let’s face it. Mom can’t be with me now, thanks to stinky internet and, oh yeah, THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS of miles and oceans and all that jazz.

But God CAN be with me.

And He IS.

When this epiphany sunk in, and I relinquished any intention of skyping the madre, GUESS WHAT.

I got to talk to my mom.

God, now you’re just showing off!

Alas, when the internet worked well enough to carry on a conversation, we had to leave OF COURSE. But it was ok. I caught Mom up and let her know there was air in my lungs. Therefore, all is right in the world.

So, because my roommate Debs is legitimately AMAZING, of course we had a life changing conversation on the way home.

We were talking about being homesick. (A common topic these days.) Debs commented, “I’m already homesick for Pietermaritzburg. And when I get home, I know I’ll be homesick for Cape Town. So I know that I’ll always be homesick for somewhere else. Because even now, I’m homesick for a place I’ve never been.”

She had puzzled me on that last one. “What do you mean?”

“I’m homesick to be with God in Heaven.”

This goofy, GINORMOUS smile crept on my face and WOULD NOT GO AWAY!!! It was great. Debs couldn’t stop laughing at my goofy smile and I couldn’t stop smiling goofily. We were obviously meant to be roommates.

When I finally gained control of my face, Debs asked, “Have you been reflecting on your time recently?”

“Absolutely! I feel like I almost reflect too much. At the beginning of the semester, I felt like I learned lessons EVERY DAY. Which was awesome. But right now, I feel like I’m on the brink of this HUGE lesson that’s taken a while to be taught to me. But I can’t quite decide what it is.”

After dinner, I decided what that lesson was.

Here it is:

God is teaching me to place EVERYTHING in Him. Seriously, EVERYTHING: my confidence, my worth, love, belonging, trust, hope, dreams, desires, fun, attitude, and HOME.

I realized today that if I was somehow able to make God my home, that would pretty much fix ALL my life’s problems.

Where do you feel most comfortable? Where are you always loved? Where do you always feel safe? Where do you want to go when you hurt? Where do you store your treasures? Where are the ones that will always love you, through thick and thin, pain and joy?

Home.

God is our home. I don’t have to try to BE anyone else when I am with Him! I am enough for Him, JUST as I am! But I’m not JUST me. Because, really? It’s FOUR for the price of one:

Me, God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit.

They live in me.

So, I’m never alone. And I can’t place worth in JUST myself, because that would be like ignoring ¾ of me!

Basically, I’m never alone, I don’t have to fight for acceptance, I never have to feel like I’m not at home, or feel afraid because God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit are with me.

I’ve found my home.

And just like Dorothy and Toto, I had to leave my house and go to another world to find what I’ve been looking for, even though it’s been there the entire time.

Ladies and Gentlemen:

I have found my home.

I am home. No matter where I am or who I’m with, or what my situation is, I am at home.

Home.

It’s such a great word, isn’t it?

Home.

 

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Mosaic

Monday, March 28th, 2011

I spent a huge part of my day working with mosaics at my service site, Ethembeni.

Tonight in D group, I realized something. We are mosaics.

We start out as a glass figure of some sort, carved by our own agendas, issues, and limited understanding.

Then a time comes when the Lord decides to break us. He smashes apart all of our pre-conceived notions, our misconceptions, and the identity given to us by the world.

But it is here that the Lord takes the pieces that are worthwhile and molds, shapes, and places them to create something new, and something more beautiful. The work now reflects the craftsman and is much more beautiful than before.

“For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness,’ made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. So then death is at work in us, but life is at work in you…

Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though outwardly, we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

-2 Corinthians 4:6-18

We are fighting an unseen battle. When I’m discouraged, I will remind myself that. Because even though OUTWARDLY, we are wasting away, we are being renewed day by day.

Satan thinks he is winning by attacking the physical body. But what chance does a body stand against the spirit when God commands the spirit?

Today, I was completely broken. It’s one thing to hear about the problems Africa faces. It is quite another to fall in love with African children and see how they are directly impacted by these problems.

How can I possibly help these children? All I can do is let them play with my hair, hold them, perform cheesy skits, and give one of them a sweatshirt.

How does that really help?

Something that is amazingly comforting is simply knowing that all I have to do is be open to what God is doing, and He will work through me. There is nothing I have to do but volunteer to be the chess piece God uses in a particular time and place. I am the vessel, and He is the miracle.

I couldn’t believe how joyful they are. They have literally NOTHING. And yet, they praise God. Tonight in D group, Liana reminded me that, “Blessed are the poor.” NEVER has that been so true. They are blessed because when they are given ANYTHING, they are JOYFUL and THANKFUL.

Having material items does NOT make us blessed. It makes us blind. We are blinded by physical things! Africa has faith because they have NOTHING else! But how would you rather be?! The LORD provides for them! And they are close to the LORD because they are reliant upon Him!

I am not saying it’s a curse to have things. It’s not. But, too much of anything is negative, hey? I believe it is my calling to bless others. Where much is given, much is required.

Liana was just a fountain of wisdom tonight. One of my favorite things she said was, “You’ll never see change in yourself until you stop looking at yourself and start staring at Jesus.”

It’s hard not to stop and question, “How am I changed? What’s different?”

And I don’t think that’s a bad thing.

But how much more change could be occurring if you don’t get in the way of God’s plans by examining yourself?

Not only am I staring at God. I am chasing after him.

Today God smashed me into a thousand pieces. He is busy designing and creating my mosaic. I am hoping when He is done, the mosaic will not look like me. I am hoping it will be a reflection of the craftsman.

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The Day has Arrived!

Tuesday, March 15th, 2011

Today, ladies and gentleman, was the day we have all been waiting for.

For today, my faithful friends, was a glorious day.

It was the day… that shan’t be forgotten.

T’was the day…

When service sites began!!! Haaaaaalelujah! Halelujah!

AH! The day of expectation!!!!

Actually, I had prided myself on not having any expectations for the service sites. “I am going in with a clean slate! I am a white board ready to be drawn on! A blank canvas ready to be colored!”

Today when my expectations were totally, utterly, and completely demolished, I realized that indeed, I did have expectations.

Bad foot!

(In isiZulu, the phrase “bad foot” is like shoot, darn, snap, sad day, etc.)

For the next four weeks, I will be serving at Ethembeni with the lovely Karissa, phenomenal Lindsay, irreplaceable Tyler, angel Shayna, and wonderful Aimee. What a team!

We began by writing down our goals for our four weeks at Ethembeni. What is awesome is that we have mostly the same goals! Convenient? I think so!

I love supervisor Claire. She’s from England! Claire has requested that whenever I am around her, I use my English accent because it is “so good it’s scary” and she misses hearing people talk like her. You don’t need to ask a theatre major twice to practice an accent!

At lunch time, all of the Ethembeni staff gathered. Out of nowhere, they began singing! In four part harmonies!

This was the moment I realized, this is where I belong! I finally get to live in a musical! SO glorious.

One of my friends has often asked me, “What is your favorite sound you’ve ever heard?” I didn’t have an answer for her. But now I do. Hearing Africans randomly burst into worship songs is definitely the most beautiful thing I have ever heard. Not only are their voices lovely, but their hearts shine. They don’t sing songs like we do. They suddenly sing music that is on their mind right at that moment, and sing it from their hearts! They believe what they are singing! It is such a worshipful experience. I love it.

Each of us at Ethembeni are paired with one social worker in order to get to know the community. My social worker is very sweet, and quite quiet. Her English is about as extensive and polished as my isiZulu. Ahem.

That is going to be a serious challenge. She won’t talk unless I ask her questions, because she is so shy! Unfortunately, she doesn’t understand the words “how” or “what.” So… it’s a lot of me pulling out my extensive isiZulu.

This is hilarious because in isiZulu, we only learned how to make conversation about the garden and the kitchen. My teacher thought that would be the most practical. And work-wise, it is! We will be doing a lot of helping in the garden and the kitchen. But, my vocabulary is still very limited! Of course, however, what can you expect after a month of  a brand new language?

My winner sentences:

Uthanda yimba imigodi? You like to dig holes?

Uyakwazi ukupeka iqanda? Do you know how to cook eggs?

Ngithanda izimbali. I like flowers.

As you can see, I’m practically fluent now.

Just kidding.

When the kids arrived at Ethembeni in the afternoon, they taught me a beautiful lesson.

I want to have the love of a child.

The love of a child is quite extraordinary. Children blindly and fearlessly love. They don’t care who you are! They don’t care what you look like, what you do, or where you’ve been. They simply love you and want to be held and cared for.

That is the love of Christ! I need to love people simply because they are children of God, and that is enough. I want to love as Christ loves me. I am going to live life with the attitude of you need love and I’m going to give it to you.

That’s what I want my life to be about.

There was one boy in particular that I am in love with! He was about 8 years old, and he was wearing a yellow Batman shirt. Obviously great. For thirty minutes, all he wanted to do was play with my hands. I have never seen a sweeter smile!

I wanted to ask him if he had parents. Because if he didn’t I was going to take him home. Unfortunately, I only know how to say, Ngithanda ifosholo. Or, I like shovels. (I am kidding! I wouldn’t really take him home!)

On the way home, I got to be the DJ, as I was sitting in the front seat. We all rocked out to A Walk to Remember. Priceless.

I get to go on a retreat tomorrow with the Ethembeni team! I am so excited!

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Alpha!

Wednesday, March 9th, 2011

And now…

I am super excited to announce…

I am going to be an ALPHA LEADER! Hurrah!!!

I can’t wait for God’s awesome plans! This is so great!

I feel like God is truly going to use me and grow me. I am incandescently happy! If there are any freshman out there… Maybe I’ll get to be your leader for the fall 2011 semester!

Alpha is an amazing program that gives incoming students a family right as they enter APU. This program is definitely something to be excited about!

I realized that this life I’m living, the one where I go to APU, was an Ambassador, found amazing friends, am studying abroad in SOUTH AFRICA, am growing and learning every day, and am now an alpha leader, has nothing to do with the life that I had planned for myself.

But you know what? This is so much better. This is my Hallelujah song. This is one very happy Renna. But I am not only excited for myself, which is the beautiful part!

Seven people from the South Africa semester are going to be Resident Advisors (RA’s)! If you live in Trinity (freshman), Engstrom (freshman), University Park (sophomores and transfers), or University Village (upperclassmen) next year, chances are, you will have an incredible RA!

I am completely excited.

Congratulations, other RA’s and Alpha Leaders!

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