by John Sutton
PARABLE #1 – The Addicted Worship Leader
It’s hard to believe that any church would choose an addict as a worship leader, but that’s exactly what happened. Over the years, Timothy had learned to hide his obsession well. He could camouflage his addiction in all but the most pressured of moments, and for over 10 years of full-time ministry, no one had ever suspected that their worship leader was an addict. His ministry had progressed and grown rapidly and as a young man he was now leading worship at one of the most recognized churches in the nation. He was making more money than ever before and was becoming known across the worship world. However, what no one knew…was that he was an addict. They say an addict must hit rock bottom before they can get help or have any hope of recovery. So far…that day had not yet come for Timothy. In fact, the opposite had occurred, rather than hitting rock bottom, he’d gone farther than he had ever dreamed or imagined.
One Sunday came when he was leading worship and a substitute guitarist was filling in for his regular. The music had been sent out weeks in advance, they had rehearsed, but for whatever reason, the sub-guitarist was off. Way off! Be it a slow song or fast, the mistakes kept happening. With each wrong note and chord, Timothy’s spirit, mind, and musicianship became more frustrated and annoyed. Wondering what high profile guest might be in the audience or what his pastor might be wondering; as the mistakes piled up, Timothy’s exasperation hurtled out of control…and finally…Timothy reached rock bottom, and with his rock bottom came these internal words spoken only in his heart: “This is so bad…I just can’t worship!!!!!”
It was as if a rocket had exploded in his soul; words ricocheting throughout his mind and spirit. Within this internal chaos, God’s loud voice broke through: What?! What did I hear you say?! Did I hear you say you can’t worship me?! Did you just say you can’t worship the King of kings, the Lord of lords, Creator of heaven and earth, because of a wrong note being played? Is that what you just said?! Am I hearing you right?! Who are you worshiping?! It certainly isn’t me if a wrong chord is preventing you from worshiping the GREAT I AM!! Timothy, what god is on your throne?!
And in this moment, the addict had been unmasked, stripped naked to finally be revealed. You see, Timothy wasn’t addicted to dependencies we normally hear about (alcohol, food, pornography, gambling, shopping, cocaine, etc.). He was an addict to perfection. With perfection as his mentor, Timothy was addicted to what people thought of him, his musicianship, his ability to put the perfect worship set together, and always needing to get everything exactly right. Under the guise of ministry and serving God, Timothy had become an addict to one of the fiercest slave masters ever to walk the earth, the god of perfection. The “great tempter” had seduced him with something good, and something noble, and Timothy had forgotten that gods and masters come in many forms and in many disguises, some far more obvious than others.
Thou shalt have no other gods before Me. Exodus 20:3
PARABLE #2 – The Worship Leader in Control
Breanna had grown up in the Church, and for her entire life had always wanted to be a worship leader. Serving as a teen leader in her church and going to a Christian college had prepared her for a life of service and ministry in the local church. She loved leading worship and she was good at it. She had a real talent for bringing people closer to God through worship and song. Fifteen years later, this talented songwriter and vocalist was literally living out her dream of working with children, youth, and adults, teaching them to worship and to become people of praise. Her ministry was taking her beyond her home church as she was frequently asked to lead worship for regional and national conferences. It was at one of these conferences where she was the guest worship leader that God spoke to her.
As the conference speaker talked about “conversations with God” and how prayer actually works, Breanna found God talking to her: Breanna, you have painted a beautiful picture of your life. It’s a godly picture. It’s people oriented. It’s a portrait filled with ministry and service. You’ve painted your life with brushstrokes that are humble, that are true, that are pure, and that are full of godly desires and wishes. It’s an image that exhibits character and thankfulness for the gifts I’ve given you. You’ve really painted something quite stunning and beautiful, but there’s just one problem…and it’s a big one: you’ve painted it.
Breanna, I am the Master Designer and the Great Painter of lives. It is I who orders your footsteps and who opens and closes doors, and when you have painted the canvas of your life it leaves no room for my work to be revealed. Are you willing to erase your picture so that I can paint the story of your life…?
As God spoke to others in that conference, God spoke to Breanna. And in the stillness of that moment, with tears leaving paths on her cheeks, she haltingly began to erase the painting she had spent years creating. Scene by scene, accomplishment by accomplishment, all were erased, and a blank canvas began to reemerge, until she finally reached the lower corner where her painting was signed. She erased her name and with that, the need to control and order her life’s plan. In this moment of sacred trust, she handed the paintbrush to God so that He might order her steps and guide her path. His name alone would be the name signed in the paintings corner as the author of her life.
The plans of the heart belong to a person…and in this heart a person plans their course; but the LORD determines their steps. Proverbs 16: 1, 9
PARABLE #3 – The Wounded Worship Leader
They had separated for a few months now, but word was getting out. Four months earlier, their marriage had ruptured. Going to their pastor, they openly shared the struggles and issues embedded in their marriage. The sacred bonds of trust and honesty had been broken. Thankfully, one was still leading worship, but for how long? How long would their pastor and church walk with them?
As the Ash Wednesday service began, they thought, “everyone’s thinking I’m the last person who should be up here leading.” Their own heart confirmed this: “I AM the last person who should be up here leading. God, why am I even here?” This was God’s response.
You are the last person who should be up here leading. But you are My child. This changes everything. You are here because I delight in you. I grieve over the brokenness and pain of your life, but you are exactly where I want you to be. My Kingdom is not like this world, and I delight in taking people the world casts away and using them for My purposes. I am made strong in your brokenness. You are here leading worship, because…it pleases me.
As the Ash Wednesday service continued, God embraced this broken child. While not perfect, they were not disqualified; while wounded, they were still chosen. As God’s love and healing enfolded them, their voice lifted higher in worship until finally, their voice reached the very doors of heaven.
Christ’s power is being perfected and is completed and shows itself most effectively in your weakness. II Corinthians 12:9
This is the stone which was rejected by you builders, which has become the chief cornerstone. I Peter 2:7
PARABLE #4 – The Worship Leader in the Mirror
The worship leader who is reading this article is the final parable in our story. It’s the person who doesn’t always feel perfect, has hidden secrets, enormous talent, is ambitious, writes great songs, is covetous, is moderately gifted, struggles with ego, doesn’t pray enough, sings in tune, is cute, reads the Bible every day, rarely reads the Bible, and on and on, and on…you can fill in the rest, because it’s your story.
You are the fourth parable, and you are writing your story right now. As the three parable figures above dealt with significant personal, ego, moral, and relationship issues, so do you and I. As you look in the mirror what does your heart tell you? What do you know to be true of yourself? What hidden addictions of the mind, body, heart, or soul pursue you secretly? How open are you to God’s plan or do you have it all figured out? In what weakness in your life is God waiting to be made strong? As the wise sage once said: “Our mess can become God’s message.”
Your story is the fourth parable. Let God write your story well.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:5-6
The parables are true and are based on actual case studies of worship leaders in the U.S.
The names used are fictional.
